Let me introduce you
to my boardroom
Welcome to the boardroom. This is where Team Tami meet — in Mohans Mind, which, as you're about to discover, is exactly as chaotic as it sounds.
There's no agenda that gets followed, no minutes that get taken, and the chairperson — that's me — has approximately 40% authority on a good day. Someone is usually on the table. Someone is always near the door. There is never order.
But this is where it all happens. And when life gets complicated — which it does, regularly — this is where I call everyone together, take a breath, and figure out what we actually need.
If you're reading this thinking a therapist with a chaotic boardroom doesn't sound very reassuring — that's Annie talking. Annie lives here too and she has concerns about most things. If you read this and something resonates, get in touch and we can meet your team.
Let me introduce you to the team.
Usually on the table. Not metaphorically — actually on the table, on what appears to be an imaginary hobby horse, singing at full volume. She has cowboy boots on and doesn't care that Cody is traditionally a boy's name. She is life and soul, does not know when to stop, and is currently blasting something loud and energetic that the rest of the room has mixed feelings about.
She's the part of me that gets the zoomies when an idea lands, books things at midnight, and makes everyone laugh in moments when laughing probably isn't appropriate. She's been quiet for a long time. She's only recently found her way back to the table, and she is not being subtle about her return.
On my left. Glasses, clean pressed shirt, already reaching for the paracetamol. Annie is the part that finds the silver lining in everything — every thing, which is both her greatest strength and the thing that makes Marmalade want to flip the table. She kept us functioning for years when functioning felt impossible. She was usually right. She is deeply unimpressed by the hobby horse situation but would absolutely defend Cody if anyone else criticised her.
Standing. Always standing. He has a clipboard and he needs answers NOW — not later, NOW. He is the reason I remember Freya's school trip needs paying whilst I'm cooking pasta. He interrupts. He is relentless. He means well. Roger and Cody have a complicated relationship that neither of them will discuss.
Sits closest to me. Think Helena Bonham Carter — specifically in something where she's smoking even though she's not supposed to, with that particular expression that says she has seen everything and is not impressed by most of it. She swears like a trooper. She would die for every single member of this team without hesitation.
She has always known when something was wrong, long before anyone else did. She was right every single time.
In the corner. Oversized hoodie, knees pulled up, face half-hidden. She likes slow, sombre music that the teenagers in my life call depressing. She often just wants to disappear and sleep. She's not dramatic about it — she's just tired, in the deep bone-level way that comes from carrying things for a long time. She got her name recently. She received it without fanfare, because that's very Beth.
Near the door. Still in her Brownie uniform, listening intently, edging closer. Something is shifting for her. I think she's beginning to realise that she doesn't have to be the one protecting everyone anymore. We have the whole team for that now.
Brownie's job — if she'll allow it — is simply to receive the safety and love she's always given to everyone else. She's learning. It's taking time. That's okay.
"Every single one of them showed up for a reason. Even the ones you'd rather not introduce at parties. Especially those ones, actually."
Held Whilst Growing
You have a boardroom too.
You might not have named them yet. You might have one voice that drowns out all the others, or one that never speaks at all. You might have a Cody who's been waiting to get back on the table, or a Beth who just needs someone to sit with her in the corner.
Parts work — the therapeutic approach I use with my clients — starts with getting curious about who's in the room. Not to silence anyone. Not to evict the difficult ones. But to understand why they're there, what they've been protecting, and what they need to feel safe enough to work together.
Because every single one of them showed up for a reason.
Work with Tami →